 |
search this site: search the web: |
by Universal_President on Tue Oct 14, 03 7:46pm
[+]
Three women walk in a pet shop. Suddenly the parrot yells out. "Yellow, pink, nd Blue." The first ladie says," Thats funny, IM wearing yellow underwear." The others then say," No way we are wearing pink and blue." To test the parrot. the next day, all of them wore white and the parrot shouted, "white! white! White!" The three women were very amazed. The final test was the third day, just as they walked the parrot yelled " Bald, curly, nd straight!" They never went there again!!!
by Anonymous_User on Tue Dec 23, 03 10:15pm
[+]
There's this fellow with a parrot. And the parrot swears like a sailor. He can swear for five minutes straight without repeating himself. Trouble is, the guy who owns him is a quiet, polite, conservative type, and this bird's foul mouth is driving him crazy. One day, it gets to be too much, so the guy grabs the parrot by the throat,shakes him really hard, and yells, "QUIT IT!". This just makes the bird mad and he swears more than ever. Then the guy gets mad, says "OK for you" and locks the bird in a kitchen cabinet. This really aggravates the bird and he claws and scratches. When the guy finally lets him out, the bird cuts loose with a stream of vulgarities that would make a veteran sailor blush. At that point, the guy is so mad that he throws the bird into the freezer. For the first few seconds there is a terrible din. The bird kicks and claws and thrashes and uses words Lenny Bruce and George Carlin NEVER thought about trying to use in their acts. Then suddenly, it gets VERY quiet. At first the guy just waits, but then he starts to think that the bird may be hurt or deeply chilled. After a couple of minutes of silence, he's so worried that he opens the freezer door. The bird calmly climbs onto the man's outstretched arm and says, "I'm awfully sorry about the trouble I gave you. I'll do my best to improve my vocabulary from now on." The man is astonished. He can't understand the transformation that has taken place. Then the parrot says, "By the way, what did the chicken do?"
by Ray_Screws on Tue Feb 10, 04 3:50pm
[+]
Dr. Phil's just a big fat moron. He got rich off of scamming everyone into thinking he's this great psychiatrist, but he's just a big fat windbag... a cult of personality that's gotten all the fat housewives and people without day jobs to love him.
|