DO YOU SPEAK..... [+] joke ballot by passiveson ACTIVE Tue Jan 23, 07 - Thu Jan 22, 09 ....Legalese? The Lawyer's Motto: *Insofar as manifestations of functional deficiencies are agreed by any and all concerned parties to be imperceivable, and are so stipulated, it is incumbent upon said heretofore mentioned parties to exercise the deferment of otherwise pertinent maintenance procedures.* In Other Words: *If it ain't broke, don't fix it.* Sesquipedality Award For Most Splendiferous Display Of Highfalutin' Vocabulary "The evidentiary record consisting of a four (4) day trial is gargantuan, elephantine, and Brobdingnagian... It would be hebetudinous and obtuse to fail to be cognizant of the adverse consequences of a ruling in this case. However, a decision by the court should not be infected with pusillanimity and timidity. The karma of this case must not be aleatory or adventitious, but a pellucid and transpicuous analysis of the law and facts... With certitude and intrepidity and hopefully, with some degree of sagacity, sapience, and perspicaciousness, this court disposes of the relevant and germane issues. Autochthonously, this court bifurcates the issues for decisional purposes. The primigenial issue is whether a new trial should be granted. The court comes to this infrangible, ineluctable, and adamantine conclusion that defendant's motion for a new trial absolutely must be denied. The French phrase 'pas du tout' is applied in rejecting the defendant's argument... I find defendant's degree of culpability to be magnitudinous and megatherine." - Circuit Judge Ralph Anderson, of South Carolina. Lawful: (adj.) Compatible with the will of a judge having jurisdiction. Lawyer: (n.) One skilled in circumvention of the law. Learning: (n.) The kind of ignorance distinguishing the studious. Lecturer: (n.) One with his hand in your pocket, his tongue in your ear and his faith in your patience. Liar: (n.) A lawyer with a roving commission. Liberty: (n.) One of Imagination's most precious possessions. Litigant: (n.) A person about to give up his skin in the for the hope of retaining his bones. Litigation: (n.) A machine which you go into as a pig and come out as a sausage. WASHINGTON STATE ATTORNEY SEASON AND BAG LIMITS 1300.01 GENERAL 1. Any person with a valid Washington State hunting license may harvest attorneys. 2. Taking of attorneys with traps or deadfalls is permitted. The use of currency as bait is prohibited. 3. Killing of attorneys with a vehicle is prohibited. If accidentally struck, remove dead attorney to roadside and proceed to nearest car wash. 4. It is unlawful to chase, herd, or harvest attorneys from a snow machine, helicopter, or aircraft. 5. It shall be unlawful to shout "whiplash", "ambulance", or "free Perrier" for the purpose of trapping attorneys. 6. It shall be unlawful to hunt attorneys within 100 yards of BMW dealerships. 7. It shall be unlawful to use cocaine, young boys, ?100 bills, prostitutes, or vehicle accidents to attract attorneys. 8. It shall be unlawful to hunt attorneys within 200 yards of courtrooms, law libraries, whorehouses, health spas, gay bars, ambulances, or hospitals. 9. If an attorney is elected to government office, it shall be a felony to hunt, trap, or possess it. 10. Stuffed or mounted attorneys must have a state health department inspection for AIDS, rabies, and vermin. 11. It shall be illegal for a hunter to disguise himself as a reporter, drug dealer, pimp, female legal clerk, sheep, accident victim, bookie, or tax accountant for the purpose of hunting attorneys. BAG LIMITS 1. Yellow Bellied Sidewinder 2 2. Two-faced Tort Feasor 1 3. Back-stabbing Divorce Litigator 4 4. Small-breasted Ball Buster (Female only) 3 5. Big-mouthed Pub Gut 2 Do you Know any Legalese? Legal What? Sure, read comment : Ballot #111500 : SEE RESULTS Comment: show your vote with comment?

v 2.0

© BESTANDWORST.COM

smile bank: