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COMMENTS:
he's only trying to protect you, and you're only trying to be, well whatever. And he should remember he was once your age. But in the end, when you get to be in his position, you'll do the same to your kids.
Of course things are never as cut-and-dry as some people here make it out to be. Yeah, my dad only wants the best for me, and I appreciate it, but the amount of yelling and belittling he does to me amounts to verbal abuse -- I did a paper on verbal aggression as a final project for a college class, and it's absolutely true. And yeah, my dad didn't post an online ballot, but the only reason for that is because he doesn't even use a computer -- doesn't even know how to turn it on. And I understand the idea of discipline -- but how much is too much? There's other ways to deal with a problem than to yell and scream. I'm not some sort of fuck-up, either -- I just recently graduated from college and I'm in the midst of looking for a job, so that's why I'm still at home right now. Once I have a job and some money, I'll move out on my own.
The thing is, on top of the verbal abuse thing mentioned earlier, I also suffer from depression, meaning that I don't have the capability to deal with emotional issues as well as other people, and he knows this and still screams at me. I've learned that yelling gets me nowhere, so I just don't do it because it aggrevates the situation, but I fear my dad for whatever reason -- well actually for multiple reasons. So that's more of the background behind the situation.
As for the situation, I had to run in and pick something up, and I supposedly tracked mud onto the floor despite thoroughly wiping my feet off. He screamed at me for tracking in, although I didn't see anything on the floor, and he just kept screaming at me, though I was willing to help clean up whatever mess there was. He cussed me out and screamed "I'm tired of this!" -- I'm not sure what he was tired of, because I very rarely track mud in. So I decided to spend the evening away from him -- why put myself in the situation where I have to be the brunt of my dad's aggression? -- and visited my grandmother, went to a movie, and went to the casino (where I won $116!). Dad works a night shift, since the company he works for screws him over, but since I won at the slots I was in a better mood and decided to head home. Dad contritely apologized to me, and we discussed the situation, and he started to blow me off. So I just said that I hope he never yells at me again, and he said that he hopes I never do anything wrong again.
The thing is, I actually respond better when someone explains things to me -- what I'm doing wrong, for instance -- in a calm and rational manner. I really do learn that way. That's how my mother talks to me. My mother and I (NOTE: My parents are married and live together, and they have a generally happy marriage) get along a lot better than my dad and me due to that. I take verbal aggression personally, not that I want to -- I just do.
I hope that clears up the situation and that people don't think of me as some whiny bitch, but rather think of this as a chronic situation.
gezz your da sounds like such a jerk, I dont understand why he would get so pissed off at you for fuckin up all the time,he sure has alot of nerve!
He seems to have a problem dealing with irritation. He (as your elder) should be mature enough to keep his calm.
Would you let anybody else speak to you like he does? Would you want to speak to anyone else like he shouts at you?
Problem is its easy to pick up traits like that without even noticing it.
A part from anything else, who is he to tell you if what you decide to do is wrong or right? Parents are not always right.... even if for most of our lives they tell us they are!
Stick t ya guns, just ya stick t ya guns..
^Pure bullshit.^
Why don't you just ignore him? My mom used to yell at me a lot, and at first I would yell back, but later on I decided to just ignore. Wear earplugs if you have to.
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