COMMENTS:
I think you should. If you're not compatiable, what's the use in getting together? If you don't have similar tastes and values, chances are you're going tobe unhappy.
by aya on Mon Jan 31, 05 3:19pm
[+]
thanks, aya
by Ezri on Mon Jan 31, 05 3:24pm
[+]
I have absolutely nothing in common with my girlfriend and we've been together for 2 years. Now that I think about it, we're so polar it's a bit surprising.
thus for you, nate..it is a no?
by Ezri on Mon Jan 31, 05 3:36pm
[+]
Hmmm ... very tough question. I am going to have to go with Other.
Most of the time, I'm inclined towards "Yes," with the understanding that it can be helpful if they are compatible ... but they don't have to be identical.
However, a lot depends on the personalities of the individuals. If one or both are very tolerant and/or open to possible enlightenment, then people with significant differences can prove to be complementarily compatible.
Cathexis are you my father?
I don't know
Love doesnt differentiate by polital leanings, I have had girlfriends with both sides of the political divide.
For me it's all about sex..everything else is secondary...she could be a hardcore Nazi and as long as she loves me I don't care..I may have to slap her around a little just to control her outbursts but she should expect that anyway..(just kiddin'..)
Well, while I think that sharing beliefs, attitudes, and values with one's significant other is a good thing, it is not necessary to a successful relationship.
Some of my answer depends on how important a particular held value is to one party and not held, or strongly oppossed by the other.
Another question: Isn't courtship a time to resolve these issues? Perhaps not: In the heat of new passion "little things" like values seem not to matter. Later, of course, after the fire dies down a bit, a new reality may emerge.
Best to try for complementarity, I'd say.
|
